This one doesn't really need a blog entry. It's pretty much how I feel every day.
But the good news is it's supposed to freezing rain again this weekend...
Tuesday, February 4, 2014
Sunday, February 2, 2014
Adventures in Knitting, or How I Gave Myself Arthritis
Last night my friend Sarah hosted the first annual (monthly, recurring) Stitch and B*tch night. Festivities included knitting, crocheting, baking, and w(h)ining. The night was a great success, with some guests (yours truly) persisting until midnight. Not only did I finish my potholder (shout out to Sarah and Katie for supplying me with materials), my friend Tina was able to effectively figure out how to drink wine while using both hands to accomplish a task.
I used to knit as a child. My grandmother taught me, and I spent a lot of time scouting out her various tools and yarns. I loved the yarn store, because much like every craft store, it's full of hope and possibility. And much like every other craft project, it inevitably ends with me spending too much money, enjoying about a second of it, and then quitting or producing a mediocre project based on my need to finish and move on to the next thing.
The best example of this in knitting was when I decided I was going to actually make a scarf I would wear. I walked into the local yarn store and promptly picked out the most expensive yarn ball in existence (that might be an exaggeration, but it was $25 and as many of you who knit will know, there are few projects that only require one ball of yarn). After discussing with the woman and settling on a knitting needle size, I begged my mother to let me have the ridiculously expensive yarn. She gave in, and I went home and promptly began to butcher another art project. Three balls of $25 yarn later, I had an hourglass shaped scarf, that went from large at one end to small in the middle and large at the other end. I was not impressed. Not only was the workmanship shoddy, but the insanely expensive designer yarn left black pieces everywhere. However, my mother was able to effectively guilt me into wearing this $75+ scarf at least once, and I can honestly say I have no idea what became of its fate.
Needless to say, I'm not a knitter.
But a few years ago my mom took it up, and I have two lovely scarves from her that are not misshapen and utilize different patterns than just knit.
So last night I decided to start up again, with an insanely hard project for someone who hasn't held needles in 10 years. The night was off to an immediate bad start when I went to the knitting store and it was closed. So Sarah suggested I make this potholder, and after a few lessons (yarn on...that one was new to me) I was knitting away as if no time had passed.
I finished the potholder (really it's not a potholder, it's more of a thing to set warm dishes down on) and I notice it's still uneven (counting stitches aside). However, I'm proud of it and I'm excited about this new tradition that will hopefully continue with my friends.
Tonight it will be holding Superbowl dip (to be described in a future blog post). Go Broncos!
 |
| I begin my knitting journey |
I used to knit as a child. My grandmother taught me, and I spent a lot of time scouting out her various tools and yarns. I loved the yarn store, because much like every craft store, it's full of hope and possibility. And much like every other craft project, it inevitably ends with me spending too much money, enjoying about a second of it, and then quitting or producing a mediocre project based on my need to finish and move on to the next thing.
 |
| The dishcloth pattern |
 |
| It has an eyelet pattern. Not well pictured here. |
Needless to say, I'm not a knitter.
 |
| Woah...I'm halfway there...Woah - Oh |
But a few years ago my mom took it up, and I have two lovely scarves from her that are not misshapen and utilize different patterns than just knit.
So last night I decided to start up again, with an insanely hard project for someone who hasn't held needles in 10 years. The night was off to an immediate bad start when I went to the knitting store and it was closed. So Sarah suggested I make this potholder, and after a few lessons (yarn on...that one was new to me) I was knitting away as if no time had passed.
 |
| The finished product |
 |
| It works! |
Saturday, February 1, 2014
Becoming an Adult
So it is 2014, and I haven't done much of anything in a while. I'm not really determined to start up a new blog, but I am making such attempt at change that I feel like I need a way to remember. And also to hold myself more accountable. So this will now be a place where I can document my life changes. If anyone is interested, please read on.
I liked DC so I put a ring on it...
And by that I mean, I made the financial commitment to this city by investing in winter clothes. More specifically, a good coat with a hood. That was my deal breaker for said coat, because my head is cold and remembering extra items of clothing is probably not going to happen. Although it is not down, I foresee that I will be attempting to purchase one of those in the near future (perchance at the North Face sale). But in all seriousness, I made the mental and metaphorical commitment to being in this city for 5+ years. That is a big deal for me, based on how hard I tried to get out of DC about two months ago. But I feel good about where I am in life, and now it is time for me to attempt to get to know this city better.
Explore DC
Since I am committing to this city, I need to make a conscious effort to get to know it better. So far, I'm not doing great with that (although I have been to a bunch of new places in Arlington recently). But this might be a March goal. I have the walking tour book for DC, so maybe if I have a spare moment in February I will go for a short walk and see some sights. But I will definitely make this a priority at some point in the year.
Become more versed in the world of cheese
Anyone who knows me will vouch for the fact that I have one extreme love in the world...and that is any and every form of cheese. So, as I mature (pronounced, ma-too-er) I have decided that my tastes should mature with me. This includes such other things as wine, whiskey and food-to-go (part of that being, to get rid of fast food as a staple of my diet), but mostly it encompasses this goal for cheese. Sometimes I walk by the nice aisle of wine and think, one day I will be able to afford those $50 bottles of wine, and actually appreciate them. But various cheeses have significantly different tastes, and so I have decided to focus my taste buds on that. I even purchased this lovely book to document my tastes (which will hopefully then be translated on to the blog).
Run my first (and second) half marathon
This one is a big deal. I started Couch to 5k a year ago when I moved here. In May I ran my first 5k EVER. Now I am attempting to run two half marathons within a month of each other (Disney Princess and Rock and Roll DC). This is INSANE. But because I knew it was insane, I joined a running group, a social jewish running group, a free running group, and got a running log. Although I have been slacking a little on the running with people thing, I am excited that this has become a part of my life. I have made it to 8.5 miles, and I feel confident I will get where I need to be in the next few weeks. It has certainly been an adventure running in the cold (and living in the cold, and breathing in the cold), but I am impressed with myself at how far I have come. My original resolution was to run an organized race each month of the year, but unfortunately I couldn't come up with one for January. I do feel that running is going to become a regular part of my life, and I can't wait to see what other fun things it brings me going forward.
Read More
This is always in the back of my mind, and always an issue. I love books. Everything about them. I have way too many. But occasionally I go through periods in my life where reading takes a backseat to other things. It happened last fall, and I hit a lull. I was finally able to drag myself out of that lull by finishing a book, and then quickly finishing another one. I think that I had become complacent in what I was reading (I tend to find something I like, and then buy like 10 other books on the subject) and I needed to shake it up. So I made an effort to have my kindle with me at all times, as well as various books in various stages of being read on my nightstand. But, this goal has a double meaning. When I say read more, I mean both read more frequently and read more types of things. I have a subscription to the Washingtonian (again, thank you groupon), as well as a subscription to the Smithsonian magazine (thank you mommy). I want to mix up my reading and make sure I end up with fewer back issues of these (I cleaned them out, and honestly most of them just got moved to the coffee table, there's some good stuff in the Washingtonian). I also want to make a better effort to read the news, whether it's the free metro paper I grab and always throw away (the man who gives them out is so sweet) or the news articles sent out by our communications department every day to keep us informed of the healthcare world. To hold myself to a book standard, I swore to follow the Pi Beta Phi book club list this year, in an attempt to complete at least 12 books. All of which will be kindle so they are easily accessible.
Live better
Super specific I know. But to me this goal encompasses all of the other ones, and more. I want to eat better (and less gluten-ey) in 2014. I want to try new foods. I want to try new things. I want to see more places. I want to do better at work, at home, at BBYO, at making friends. I want to read more. I want to feel better during the days and nights. So this comes with some smaller more specific steps. I am trying yoga and I signed up for a GRE class (thank you groupon). I am spending my weekends doing things, instead of spending 8 hours in bed. I am going to cross train and NOT just run (insert yoga and potentially joining a gym). I am going to take the opportunities, but also learn to say no (this is a biggie for me). I am going to cook more. And I am going to have a more organized life, so I got a new planner.
Keep track of it
Last year I got a 2013 day journal, and I only made it through February. I have been trying to keep track of things (running, cheese) as best I can, but I have a feeling this blog might be the answer. I am going to make a calculated effort to keep track of all of this stuff, and post fun blogs with pictures and stuff. But who knows? It might only last a month. It might be too much. I might get bored or remember how good bread with gluten tastes. Only time will tell.
I will say, I am impressed with this first blog. I even put links in.
And to make it even better, I'm adding in a picture from the new year. To remind myself how well it started out.
I liked DC so I put a ring on it...
And by that I mean, I made the financial commitment to this city by investing in winter clothes. More specifically, a good coat with a hood. That was my deal breaker for said coat, because my head is cold and remembering extra items of clothing is probably not going to happen. Although it is not down, I foresee that I will be attempting to purchase one of those in the near future (perchance at the North Face sale). But in all seriousness, I made the mental and metaphorical commitment to being in this city for 5+ years. That is a big deal for me, based on how hard I tried to get out of DC about two months ago. But I feel good about where I am in life, and now it is time for me to attempt to get to know this city better.
Explore DC
Since I am committing to this city, I need to make a conscious effort to get to know it better. So far, I'm not doing great with that (although I have been to a bunch of new places in Arlington recently). But this might be a March goal. I have the walking tour book for DC, so maybe if I have a spare moment in February I will go for a short walk and see some sights. But I will definitely make this a priority at some point in the year.
Become more versed in the world of cheese
Anyone who knows me will vouch for the fact that I have one extreme love in the world...and that is any and every form of cheese. So, as I mature (pronounced, ma-too-er) I have decided that my tastes should mature with me. This includes such other things as wine, whiskey and food-to-go (part of that being, to get rid of fast food as a staple of my diet), but mostly it encompasses this goal for cheese. Sometimes I walk by the nice aisle of wine and think, one day I will be able to afford those $50 bottles of wine, and actually appreciate them. But various cheeses have significantly different tastes, and so I have decided to focus my taste buds on that. I even purchased this lovely book to document my tastes (which will hopefully then be translated on to the blog).
Run my first (and second) half marathon
This one is a big deal. I started Couch to 5k a year ago when I moved here. In May I ran my first 5k EVER. Now I am attempting to run two half marathons within a month of each other (Disney Princess and Rock and Roll DC). This is INSANE. But because I knew it was insane, I joined a running group, a social jewish running group, a free running group, and got a running log. Although I have been slacking a little on the running with people thing, I am excited that this has become a part of my life. I have made it to 8.5 miles, and I feel confident I will get where I need to be in the next few weeks. It has certainly been an adventure running in the cold (and living in the cold, and breathing in the cold), but I am impressed with myself at how far I have come. My original resolution was to run an organized race each month of the year, but unfortunately I couldn't come up with one for January. I do feel that running is going to become a regular part of my life, and I can't wait to see what other fun things it brings me going forward.
Read More
This is always in the back of my mind, and always an issue. I love books. Everything about them. I have way too many. But occasionally I go through periods in my life where reading takes a backseat to other things. It happened last fall, and I hit a lull. I was finally able to drag myself out of that lull by finishing a book, and then quickly finishing another one. I think that I had become complacent in what I was reading (I tend to find something I like, and then buy like 10 other books on the subject) and I needed to shake it up. So I made an effort to have my kindle with me at all times, as well as various books in various stages of being read on my nightstand. But, this goal has a double meaning. When I say read more, I mean both read more frequently and read more types of things. I have a subscription to the Washingtonian (again, thank you groupon), as well as a subscription to the Smithsonian magazine (thank you mommy). I want to mix up my reading and make sure I end up with fewer back issues of these (I cleaned them out, and honestly most of them just got moved to the coffee table, there's some good stuff in the Washingtonian). I also want to make a better effort to read the news, whether it's the free metro paper I grab and always throw away (the man who gives them out is so sweet) or the news articles sent out by our communications department every day to keep us informed of the healthcare world. To hold myself to a book standard, I swore to follow the Pi Beta Phi book club list this year, in an attempt to complete at least 12 books. All of which will be kindle so they are easily accessible.
Live better
Super specific I know. But to me this goal encompasses all of the other ones, and more. I want to eat better (and less gluten-ey) in 2014. I want to try new foods. I want to try new things. I want to see more places. I want to do better at work, at home, at BBYO, at making friends. I want to read more. I want to feel better during the days and nights. So this comes with some smaller more specific steps. I am trying yoga and I signed up for a GRE class (thank you groupon). I am spending my weekends doing things, instead of spending 8 hours in bed. I am going to cross train and NOT just run (insert yoga and potentially joining a gym). I am going to take the opportunities, but also learn to say no (this is a biggie for me). I am going to cook more. And I am going to have a more organized life, so I got a new planner.
Keep track of it
Last year I got a 2013 day journal, and I only made it through February. I have been trying to keep track of things (running, cheese) as best I can, but I have a feeling this blog might be the answer. I am going to make a calculated effort to keep track of all of this stuff, and post fun blogs with pictures and stuff. But who knows? It might only last a month. It might be too much. I might get bored or remember how good bread with gluten tastes. Only time will tell.
I will say, I am impressed with this first blog. I even put links in.
And to make it even better, I'm adding in a picture from the new year. To remind myself how well it started out.
Monday, April 25, 2011
Four Years Ago
I was sitting in Chain Reaction graduation the other night, and the magnitude of the event hit me. Not that the senior members are graduating, but that I have now sat through 3 graduations. That means that my prelude with Chain Reaction began over three years ago, and for the first time the end is in sight. Chain Reaction, as many of you know, has been my life for most of high school. It is such a staple in my life that I can't imagine parting with it even more than I can't believe I will be leaving high school this year to venture in to the big bad unknown world of college. I can see things around me winding down everywhere...the end of the UF semester, the reviews for AP tests, graduation anouncements, the ending of most school clubs. And all I can wonder is, will the rest of my life pass this quickly? Because as eager as I am to leave high school behind, will I be that eager if the next four years pass as quickly as the last four years have? I signed a lease, I made contact with the UF collegiate council, I signed up for preview, and I bought student football tickets...I have already rushed this foray into the unknown...and high school isn't even over yet!
I drove by the GHS marquee yesterday and saw something written about the Class of 2007. For so long that year has stood out in my mind as the year I would graduate high school. And for the first time, I realized I was sad about graduating. Not about leaving GHS, but just about being old enough to graduate. We have all been sheltered for so long and now we are being scattered, as if someone reached down and just threw us and saw where we landed. But the scarier thing is, that this is not the last time in our lives that we will be scattered. In four years some of us will return, some of us will venture out further into the world, and some may not be here to continue.
It's weird to think I can remember a time when 1 minute seemed like forever. When I thought 60 minutes to an hour was way too many minutes. When I thought the end of middle school was decades away. When I couldn't believe we were a year into the new millenium. When I started high school and wished so desperately the four years would be over. But now I have run out of things to count down, things to look forward to. The fact that I had to calculate my year of college graduation on facebook seems unfathomable to me. How could this be it?
So back to Chain Reaction graduation. It is amazing to see, from a graduate's point of view, how one person can change the life of another. But that's what happens in Chain Reaction. While we are out there working for the babies, we fail to realize that we have inadvertantly changed the lives of those around us. Allie Weiner said something that really summed it all up. She said, "From the outside, we are just the kids in purple polos at WalkAmerica, and the kids who sell club MOD tickets. But if you could see the Chain Reaction I have seen, you would see kids who have bonded so much, we are all sitting in the ticket booth together, even though it only requires 2 people to sell tickets." And she's right. Watching the chain reaction is a real and tangible thing. These kids who 9 months ago sat in a room with me being interviewed are not the same kids who have just graduated to senior member status. They began as 19 individuals, and now they are a group bonded so much more deeply than you could ever hope to see. Chain Reaction graduation offers a real chance to watch lives change, and I was glad to see it the other night.
So what was this about? I'm not sure. Graduation is sneaking up on us faster than we realize, and as happy as we are to get out of here, I believe that some of us are stlil nervous about leaving. I am...
April 25, 2007
**
Seems as though not much has changed. Chain Reaction graduation is tomorrow night. My graduation is next Saturday. Once again we're being scattered. I think I feel more confident in knowing that there are some things that will never change. People are always moving, always changing. We are always alone in the making of these decisions, and we alone can control who stays in our lives and who goes. As for me, I think it's safe to say I am a long way from losing touch with the most important people in my life. The biggest difference between these four years and those four years is how much stronger these four years have made me, and how that strength translates into my relationships. I can easily say this has been four years of regret, but as for now, as the outcome measure goes, it was pretty successful. T-6 days and counting...
April 25, 2011
I drove by the GHS marquee yesterday and saw something written about the Class of 2007. For so long that year has stood out in my mind as the year I would graduate high school. And for the first time, I realized I was sad about graduating. Not about leaving GHS, but just about being old enough to graduate. We have all been sheltered for so long and now we are being scattered, as if someone reached down and just threw us and saw where we landed. But the scarier thing is, that this is not the last time in our lives that we will be scattered. In four years some of us will return, some of us will venture out further into the world, and some may not be here to continue.
It's weird to think I can remember a time when 1 minute seemed like forever. When I thought 60 minutes to an hour was way too many minutes. When I thought the end of middle school was decades away. When I couldn't believe we were a year into the new millenium. When I started high school and wished so desperately the four years would be over. But now I have run out of things to count down, things to look forward to. The fact that I had to calculate my year of college graduation on facebook seems unfathomable to me. How could this be it?
So back to Chain Reaction graduation. It is amazing to see, from a graduate's point of view, how one person can change the life of another. But that's what happens in Chain Reaction. While we are out there working for the babies, we fail to realize that we have inadvertantly changed the lives of those around us. Allie Weiner said something that really summed it all up. She said, "From the outside, we are just the kids in purple polos at WalkAmerica, and the kids who sell club MOD tickets. But if you could see the Chain Reaction I have seen, you would see kids who have bonded so much, we are all sitting in the ticket booth together, even though it only requires 2 people to sell tickets." And she's right. Watching the chain reaction is a real and tangible thing. These kids who 9 months ago sat in a room with me being interviewed are not the same kids who have just graduated to senior member status. They began as 19 individuals, and now they are a group bonded so much more deeply than you could ever hope to see. Chain Reaction graduation offers a real chance to watch lives change, and I was glad to see it the other night.
So what was this about? I'm not sure. Graduation is sneaking up on us faster than we realize, and as happy as we are to get out of here, I believe that some of us are stlil nervous about leaving. I am...
April 25, 2007
**
Seems as though not much has changed. Chain Reaction graduation is tomorrow night. My graduation is next Saturday. Once again we're being scattered. I think I feel more confident in knowing that there are some things that will never change. People are always moving, always changing. We are always alone in the making of these decisions, and we alone can control who stays in our lives and who goes. As for me, I think it's safe to say I am a long way from losing touch with the most important people in my life. The biggest difference between these four years and those four years is how much stronger these four years have made me, and how that strength translates into my relationships. I can easily say this has been four years of regret, but as for now, as the outcome measure goes, it was pretty successful. T-6 days and counting...
April 25, 2011
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there, I do not sleep.
I am in a thousand winds that blow,
I am the softly falling snow.
I am the gentle showers of rain,
I am the fields of ripening grain.
I am in the morning hush,
I am in the graceful rush
Of beautiful birds in circling flight,
I am the starshine of the night.
I am in the flowers that bloom,
I am in a quiet room.
I am in the birds that sing,
I am in each lovely thing.
Do not stand at my grave bereft
I am not there. I have not left.
I am not there, I do not sleep.
I am in a thousand winds that blow,
I am the softly falling snow.
I am the gentle showers of rain,
I am the fields of ripening grain.
I am in the morning hush,
I am in the graceful rush
Of beautiful birds in circling flight,
I am the starshine of the night.
I am in the flowers that bloom,
I am in a quiet room.
I am in the birds that sing,
I am in each lovely thing.
Do not stand at my grave bereft
I am not there. I have not left.
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
what did I do for fun when I was 10 years old?
I revisited Ms. Rubin's blog in a blatant attempt to procrastinate studying some more (although as per my resolutions I have done all the readings for the assigned dates), and I came across her challenge question for this week:
What did you do for fun when you were 10 years old?
I'm sad to say that I can barely remember that far back (it really wasn't that far back). What I do remember is that it was almost the turn of the millenium, a time of turmoil when the world was entering the unknown (remember Y2K?). My favorite movie at the time was Zenon Girl of the 21st Century (cetus lepidus she looks young), which I can distinctly remember because it inspired some...interesting fashion choices on my part.
Turning 10 and entering the 5th grade was a big deal at the small school I attended, as it meant you were now a part of the senior class. Three or four new students joined us that year, and I can remember the drama they would create in later years. There were 9 of us that made it from 5th-8th grade (with only one dropout--me, and I returned), and my best friend is one of the girls who came from that class (14 years and counting). We bought messenger bags instead of backpacks, because at the turn of the millenium those were what the grown-ups had.
Interestingly, 10 years old was the first year I went to the camp that I have now worked at for four years. And I had a phenomenal summer. I was not an outdoor kid, but I still have the hundreds of beaded necklaces and bracelets on spiral wire stored in my "memory box." I also know that at that age I loved to read, and I remember bringing the second Harry Potter book with me to camp (which I now regret because my mother wrote my name in permanent marker on the first page of that FIRST EDITION). Long before these books gained popularity I knew they would come to be my favorites.
It's hard to say what else I had fun doing when I was 10 years old, because honestly I wasn't allowed to do much. I went to a lot of movies and I had sleepovers, and I guess I enjoyed doing those things but it may just have been default. I know that when I was 10 I discovered how much I liked volleyball, but I didn't play until I was 11. I'm not sure if I went to the movies because it was cool to be without my parents or because I really wanted to go to the movies that often (fortunately back then I could afford to go that often).
In some ways I think I had already narrowed down my favorite activities at 10. Even my favorite books were already picked out. Which may have been Gretchen's point in this reflection...those activities should still bring me the happiness I am looking for.
What did you do for fun when you were 10 years old?
I'm sad to say that I can barely remember that far back (it really wasn't that far back). What I do remember is that it was almost the turn of the millenium, a time of turmoil when the world was entering the unknown (remember Y2K?). My favorite movie at the time was Zenon Girl of the 21st Century (cetus lepidus she looks young), which I can distinctly remember because it inspired some...interesting fashion choices on my part.
Turning 10 and entering the 5th grade was a big deal at the small school I attended, as it meant you were now a part of the senior class. Three or four new students joined us that year, and I can remember the drama they would create in later years. There were 9 of us that made it from 5th-8th grade (with only one dropout--me, and I returned), and my best friend is one of the girls who came from that class (14 years and counting). We bought messenger bags instead of backpacks, because at the turn of the millenium those were what the grown-ups had.
Interestingly, 10 years old was the first year I went to the camp that I have now worked at for four years. And I had a phenomenal summer. I was not an outdoor kid, but I still have the hundreds of beaded necklaces and bracelets on spiral wire stored in my "memory box." I also know that at that age I loved to read, and I remember bringing the second Harry Potter book with me to camp (which I now regret because my mother wrote my name in permanent marker on the first page of that FIRST EDITION). Long before these books gained popularity I knew they would come to be my favorites.
It's hard to say what else I had fun doing when I was 10 years old, because honestly I wasn't allowed to do much. I went to a lot of movies and I had sleepovers, and I guess I enjoyed doing those things but it may just have been default. I know that when I was 10 I discovered how much I liked volleyball, but I didn't play until I was 11. I'm not sure if I went to the movies because it was cool to be without my parents or because I really wanted to go to the movies that often (fortunately back then I could afford to go that often).
In some ways I think I had already narrowed down my favorite activities at 10. Even my favorite books were already picked out. Which may have been Gretchen's point in this reflection...those activities should still bring me the happiness I am looking for.
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
It's an interesting place
Endings always make you reflect. On what you've done, on what you're doing, on what you're going to do, and on what you could've done differently. Unfortunately I've recently been confronted with the "what I could've done differently" phase, which for some reasons feels more plausible than the "what you're going to do" phase. It's bothersome because changing the past is as unattainable as predicting the future. Yet I manage to sit here every day and look back at past decisions and wonder, "Emily, WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?"
As the big wide world of the future looms ahead of us, my friends and I have certainly gone off the deep end. Between the weird and often violent dreams, the excessive laziness, and the extreme insecurities that fester around us, I am surprised that we are still managing to lead fairly stable lives. Some have turned to compulsive habits like applying to too many jobs or joining the peace corps, while I have chosen to sit back and analyze every decision I've ever made. And where has it left me? Wishing for time travel.
If they invent time travel in my lifetime, will I go back and warn past Emily of her extremely bad judgement? Assuming that by that time I have lived out most of my adult life and I will know basically how the story ends, will I want to go back and change it knowing full well that happiness now could mean extreme unhappiness in the future? In such a sense, is time travel even ethical enough to pursue, considering it could very well end lives that are already in existence?
No. The truth of the matter is that my story has more pages left unwritten than I have even begun to live. In the words of Alanis Morisette, "Life has a funny, funny way of helping you out." And I can say with extreme honesty that I have looked at both sides of some decisions I have made and see that even though it was hard at the time, I am a better person because of that decision. But what if they invented time travel tomorrow, and I was able to go back and do it all better. Take the classes I wanted, make better grades, find friends I never knew existed and apologize to those I know I've hurt. It's so hard to see when you're on the inside looking out, and it's so hard to say that the unknown consequences of those decisions wouldn't seem worth it at this point.
There's a Rascal Flatts song that claims "I wouldn't change a thing. I'd walk right back through the rain. Back through every broken heart on the day that it was breaking. And I'd relive all the years, and be thankful for the tears I've cried with every stumble step that led to you and got me here." I can't imagine this being true. I can't imagine being in a place where all this pain and all these mistakes are worth it. But that somebody feels this way, gives me hope that one day, I will too.
Fortunately this is all irrelevant, and all I can say to past Emily is, how are we the same person? Why is it so much easier for me to logically see how you are making bad decisions? Fortunately, she'll never know how things turn out.
As the big wide world of the future looms ahead of us, my friends and I have certainly gone off the deep end. Between the weird and often violent dreams, the excessive laziness, and the extreme insecurities that fester around us, I am surprised that we are still managing to lead fairly stable lives. Some have turned to compulsive habits like applying to too many jobs or joining the peace corps, while I have chosen to sit back and analyze every decision I've ever made. And where has it left me? Wishing for time travel.
If they invent time travel in my lifetime, will I go back and warn past Emily of her extremely bad judgement? Assuming that by that time I have lived out most of my adult life and I will know basically how the story ends, will I want to go back and change it knowing full well that happiness now could mean extreme unhappiness in the future? In such a sense, is time travel even ethical enough to pursue, considering it could very well end lives that are already in existence?
No. The truth of the matter is that my story has more pages left unwritten than I have even begun to live. In the words of Alanis Morisette, "Life has a funny, funny way of helping you out." And I can say with extreme honesty that I have looked at both sides of some decisions I have made and see that even though it was hard at the time, I am a better person because of that decision. But what if they invented time travel tomorrow, and I was able to go back and do it all better. Take the classes I wanted, make better grades, find friends I never knew existed and apologize to those I know I've hurt. It's so hard to see when you're on the inside looking out, and it's so hard to say that the unknown consequences of those decisions wouldn't seem worth it at this point.
There's a Rascal Flatts song that claims "I wouldn't change a thing. I'd walk right back through the rain. Back through every broken heart on the day that it was breaking. And I'd relive all the years, and be thankful for the tears I've cried with every stumble step that led to you and got me here." I can't imagine this being true. I can't imagine being in a place where all this pain and all these mistakes are worth it. But that somebody feels this way, gives me hope that one day, I will too.
Fortunately this is all irrelevant, and all I can say to past Emily is, how are we the same person? Why is it so much easier for me to logically see how you are making bad decisions? Fortunately, she'll never know how things turn out.
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